Relationship Mixer #5

Commitment :: Defined as :: This is a hard one, so i found this little short that encapsulates the meaning fairly well i think...

Commitment is what
Transforms the promise into reality.
It is the words that speak
Boldly of your intentions.
And the actions which speak
Louder than the words.
It is making the time
When there is none.
Coming through time
After time after time,
Year after year after year.
Commitment is the stuff
Character is made of;
The power to change
The face of things.
It is the daily triumph
Of integrity over skepticism.

Commitment is a huge decision with any aspect of our lives. In the realm of relationships (vs commitments in life that are minor such as committing to cooking a good meal, sleeping more than 8 hours, cleaning your room, etc) commitment is a very strong "action". As the above passage said "Commitment is what, Transforms the promise into reality." which is basically saying that a commitment is an action that shows someone else that we are prepared to take on any hardships/stumbles that commitment may have in store for the future. So when looking at relationships, and we're talking about serious relationships, it is one of the most significant point in the relationship where each party commits to each other. One fallacy in this concept is that in a relationship it's very hard to tell when one person is ready to move to that crucial stage. Though i suppose it depends on each couple and how open they are to each other about such feelings... But in the very early stages of any relationship or even the middle stages there's always a hesitation in commitment. Both males and females have consistently pulled a "I'm not ready for commitment" card on their significant other. So basically they're not ready to think about that far into the future with the person they are with. This is pretty much the worse thing in a relationship because at this point one person has "confessed" their commitment to the other and the party that's "not ready for commitment" has just broke the other person's heart... then it gets all gushy and uneasy with each other... and it's probably really awkward haha... Of course there's the opposite extreme that they are both willing to "wait" it out for each of them to get on the same "level" as the other... but come on... when does that EVER happen in a relationship. I believe that if two people in a relationship are growing differently in their lives and they are not at the same stage it is very hard for them to take things to a serious level without one of them questioning the others intent of the relationship, which ends up in "breakup" usually or a very long waiting period before getting serious. I'm not saying this to be pessimisstic, but as a general rule, we should probably be careful of which relationships we get ourselves into. In this day and age i'm fairly confident... 65% of people know the warning signs of a relationship that won't work out. It's just a matter of time before they realize it however (infatuation blinds people in relationships, etc etc). And i am also definitely not saying that when we're involved with someone to break it off if we think they're not on the same level as us, but it will definitely be a speed bump in the future. The early works (dating) of relationships are merely getting to know someone else anyways so what's the harm in that? None i'd say, some may say it's leading the other person on, but in the end if you don't think it's the right thing to pursue, they can't say anything about it really because you two haven't commited to each other.

Now the action of commitment is hard and almost impossible to define, but i was engaged in a conversation once that really had me thinking it was the right mindset for commitments. It goes to say that the amazing 3 words of "I love you" is basically your commitment to that other person. However, this is in a very traditional sense, which is very hard to find these days. You here a lot in bad break ups where one party will say "I thought he/she loved me..." or "He/she said he/she loved me!" and... well... that just goes to show that whenever the couple started saying they loved each other was not the right time or it was said in a very superficial sense (without them knowing of course). Love is a very strong word. Sure you can say you love sushi, driving, shopping, etc, but as i'm sure you know those are all objects of this world (exception: we Love God and our families! =D) and not your significant other. I suppose i'll categorize saying "I love you" to a signficant other is almost like saying that you're going to marry them, it's that strong of a word. And the actual marriage is merely a public announcement that you and that person are together... forever! This idea is a very conservative view on commitments. But if you really sit down and think about a commitment and apply it to our society today. We should try to stray away from what we observe as bad practices of using the word Love. It's just thrown around too much and it comes out of people's mouth's as if it's saying you like taking long showers. So then where can we distinguish between what's genuine love and the superficial love we throw around? And that's where we can make the difference... in relationships. Just to accept the societal standard that we can "love" almost anything we see on a day to day basis, we should slow things down when in a relationship and save those precious words for the right day and time. Don't let it come off as something "natural" to say. It should be a VERY well thought out decision by you, for you to commit to your significant other. Relationships fail a lot where the "Love" is brought into the picture, it makes breakups harder and it gives people the false sense of security, if said at the wrong time in a relationship.

So the whole 'love' thing is not the only view on the idea of commiting to a significant other i'd say. I don't really want to go into any crazy details on the other ways two people can be committed to each other. In my mind the idea of "I love you" as a commitment driven phrase in a relationship is a very realistic issue in our lives. There have been too many hearbreaks in this world to prove that saying "I love you" as a superficial/casual thing to say to your significant other leads down the road to which there are many pot holes and speed bumps... figuratively. In the end, no one will ever know if it was the right time to say "I love you" to their significant other... that's the catch in it all! I suppose I could be just encouraging you, as the reader, to be careful in your decisions and what you get yourself involved in. There are too many aspects to consider when going into a relationship and to be honest we never get the time to sit down and think things through to put things into perspective for ourselves...

Life is life and we all live it.

End note :: This was a pretty hard topic to write about in just one post without rambling on forever (and to save my brain from overloading, it's been a long day..)

DYung

8/9/09

Disappointment...

That's what i feel right now... i didn't do that well on my first thermo exam... and in order for me to pull off a decent grade (Like an A) i need to basically ACE the next midterm and the final....... BLAHHHH

I am full of fail....

the balance of Academics, Friends, and Sleep... is slowly slipping away from academics... but that will change!!! good bye friends... or sleep............. just for the next month!

I'm going to start doing more studying ahead of time and more practice problems!!! RAWR BUCKLE DOWN - RAGE TIME!

I really hope i can pull off a good grade in thermo... =T


7/21/09

Blahh

I fail at posting... i know... i'll try my best soon.

Justice will be served!

This ticket was issued where there is NO residential parking-only sign. If you are familiar with the area there are residential-only signs but only in the inner drive-thru's of the Chester Park community. I was parked away from these signs and on the main part of Massachusetts Avenue, of which the signs do not indicate resident only parking. (In front of 580 Mass. Ave.)

Thank you for your consideration in this appeal.

I hate the City of Boston just for cases like this where i was NOT parked in residential parking... such bull crap... i've been parking in that area for the LAST SIX MONTHS.... and i wasn't given a ticket then??? WTF... so stupid... honestly... they think they can make up rules on the spot and get their ticket quota up? yeah right. i know what i can or can't do. even my realtor told me i could park where i parked since he lived in the area for a year with no resident sticker (for reference my realtor was a really nice guy, gave us a break on the fee, gave us pointers, etc, awesome guy). Least to say i'm glad to be getting rid of my car (returning it home to jersey) because of stupid little things like this, but at the sametime I'm going to miss having the freedom of going wherever i want pretty much... relying on MBTA makes going places take up more time... oh well.

BLAH - I KNOW YOU HATE ME CITY OF BOSTON..........

/end rant

PS - i saw someone with the Three Wolves T-shirt from my previous post..... hahhaahahahahahaahahahaha.....

Internet Awesome #1

So I stumbled upon this while at work (of course) and HAD to share.

All from Amazon.com

As a preface:: these are customer reviews that are just... ridiculous and hilarious :)

Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt, Available in Various Sizes

Visit the link to see the T-Shirt design...

#1 Comment :: 8,244 of 8,313 people found the following review helpful...

This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to 'howl at the moon' from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn't have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.

I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.

Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.

#2 Comment :: 1,529 of 1,556 people found the following review helpful...

Unfortunately I already had this exact picture tattooed on my chest, but this shirt is very useful in colder weather.

#3 Comment :: 990 of 1,025 people found the following review helpful...

So I'm looking for threads that say, "Hey baby...I'm real boss!" when I stumble upon this epic creation. The wolves spoke to me in a language all their own; it was like German, Mongol, and Bitchin all mixed together. I mean, one wolf howlin at the moon is major...but three???

I ordered next-day air (if only there was same day!), and, of course, a size smaller than usual to ensure the closeness of the wolves to my chest hair. When the package arrived, I tore it open, and I SWEAR angels sang. I think it was Freebird. I immediately removed my "No Fat Chicks" shirt, and replaced it with this finery. Lemme tell you: AW YEAH.

I'll spare the details of my conquests since I started wearing this shrit; suffice to say, I'm swimming in a sea of babes the likes of which are usually found on those K-Tel infomercials. I'm also more confident at work, and expect to be promoted to cashier soon. I owe everything to this shirt (I should say "shirts", since I now own 23 of them).

Sea Cows T-Shirt

Visit the link to see the T-Shirt design...

#1 Comment :: 74 of 75 people found the following review helpful...

It's not everyday that someone comes into possession of a shirt like this. I received it as a gift from my grandmother- something I was at first worried about- she's usually the lame grandma who gives ugly sweatshirts from American Eagle or disgusting pants from Hollister and makes you wear them every time she sees you (to think, some people haven't caught on to the trend of wearing chains on their pants!), but as soon as I opened this I knew it was different. There, on top of packing paper, sat the most magnificent Sea Cow I've ever seen- the solemn face held me captivated. As I looked upon the face of those Sea Cows, I knew that they knew- they knew my struggle in life, they knew (as I did) that I could be someone in this shirt.

Now, I'm not the type of person to dress fancy when I go out, but I had a last-second change of heart as I was getting into my mom's car to go to my weekly Yu-Gi-Oh tournament. I had a feeling that those two Sea Cows would give me luck, so I raced back inside to put it on; and as I arrived at the tournament, stepping out of my mom's 2001 Chrysler mini-van, I locked eyes with the most beautiful women I've ever seen. The sun shone behind her, illuminating the purple and pink stands of dyed hair, her ears- substantially gauged- nearly touched her shoulders, her eyes glinted, almost hidden by large bulbous pimples, gaudy eye shadow, and press-on eyelashes; it was at this moment that our eyes locked and I knew she would be the Arbiter to my Master Chief.

"Are those Sea Cows?" she said, surveying the ocean scenery adorning my chest.

"Yup!" I responded, chains on my jet-black pants rattling in the light breeze.

"Can I touch them?"

She slowly extended an erect pointer finger with gnarled nails, chewed down short, and cuticles bleeding. As she rubbed her finger over the face of the largest Sea Cow, I shuddered slightly. Releasing the courage stored within those Sea Cows, I slowly grasped her hand, intertwined my fingers with hers.

"Want to be girlfriend and boyfriend?" I exclaimed. "We can leave this tournament and go to Denny's. I'm sure my mom can pick us up if your parents drive."

"No need. I brought my bike- you can ride on the handlebars." She whispered toward me, the smell of tuna and Funyuns emanating from her yellowed teeth.

It was from this day forth that I fell in love with Denise, and I owe it all to this Sea Cow shirt. We've been in love for 14 hours now, most of which we've spent beating the last level of Kingdom Hearts in my mom's basement, but we've also started planning our wedding. I'm thinking a Sea Cow and Howling Wolf theme...

#2 Comment ::

I love my Sea Cow shirt, even more than I love my ex-girlfriends!

How could I not love a shirt that gave me my life back? You see, several months ago, I purchased a Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt, Available in Various Sizes, and it changed my life! After 30 years I finally moved out of my parent's living room and got a place of my own in their basement! When I wore my Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt, Available in Various Sizes out in public, I would turn more than a few heads! Women began to notice me, and then even talk to me! After a while, I had several women following me, and asking to come back to my "den"... of course I let them.

My parents began to complain about the noise at night, they said that all the howling, panting and growling noises were keeping them up. They also began to complain about the smell. But since I was wearing my Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt, Available in Various Sizes, I had the chutzpah to tell my parents that "it's my territory, and I'll mark it anyway I want to!"

I thought I had it made! A place of my own... seven ladies who lived with me, and every night we would go on successful "hunts" and grab the raw pork chops and hamburger out of my parent's `fridge before they could come home from work to cook, and thus spoil, all that wonderful raw meat... ah what a daring soul I was while wearing my Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt, Available in Various Sizes!

Then one evening, as me and my ladies were "frolicking", my parents knocked on our door and said that it was ten pm, and we had been "at it" since five, and could we perhaps keep the noise level down, just for this one night?

Then it hit me... we started at 5, and now it was ten. We had been frolicking for five hours... which meant that I had had an erection which had lasted for 5 hours. Five hours! That's a whole hour more than four! In a panic I called 911 and told them I had had an erection that had lasted for more than four hours, and what should I do? I swear I heard laughter over the phone before they hung up on me. In a panic, I stripped off my Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt, Available in Various Sizes and went to the corner of the room where my pile of laundry was.

As I pawed through the mound of wrinkled shirts and old leisure suits, I pulled out my most recent acquisition, the Sea Cow shirt. The second my eyes fell on the image of those peaceful, bloated and majestic animals... my stiff member instantly became limp and flaccid, a perfect imitation of the Sea Cow's beautifully wrinkled and dangling trunk... I was saved!

In celebration of my survival, I suggested to my ladies that we eat out this evening, my treat! So, I went up and grabbed all the salad from my parent's `fridge and we sat by the pool and dined on the amazingly succulent leafy greens. My girlfriends soon tired of this however, and left me. And so now, my life is my own again! The bite marks are healing, and I moved back into my parent's living room, as the fleas in the basement were really irritating. And now, I spend my days languidly floating in the pool and noshing on a wonderfully selection of chef salads, or bean sprouts and kale. Now that I have "the good life" and no longer have to worry about satisfying the appetites of seven girlfriends, I have gained over 100 lbs, which is not easy to do on a diet of cabbage sprouts and kale let me tell you! And I owe it all to the amazing Sea Cow shirt!

It only gets BETTER....... But to save space I'll just post the link to... scroll down to the comments

Breakthrough Wolf T-Shirt - Available in Various Sizes (Follows up above posts)

Oh and this deserves a look...

Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz

For the nerdy of us...

The Story about Ping (Reading Railroad Books) (Paperback)

#1 Comment :: 9,179 of 9,486 people found the following review helpful...

PING! The magic duck!

Using deft allegory, the authors have provided an insightful and intuitive explanation of one of Unix's most venerable networking utilities. Even more stunning is that they were clearly working with a very early beta of the program, as their book first appeared in 1933, years (decades!) before the operating system and network infrastructure were finalized.

The book describes networking in terms even a child could understand, choosing to anthropomorphize the underlying packet structure. The ping packet is described as a duck, who, with other packets (more ducks), spends a certain period of time on the host machine (the wise-eyed boat). At the same time each day (I suspect this is scheduled under cron), the little packets (ducks) exit the host (boat) by way of a bridge (a bridge). From the bridge, the packets travel onto the internet (here embodied by the Yangtze River).

The title character -- er, packet, is called Ping. Ping meanders around the river before being received by another host (another boat). He spends a brief time on the other boat, but eventually returns to his original host machine (the wise-eyed boat) somewhat the worse for wear.

If you need a good, high-level overview of the ping utility, this is the book. I can't recommend it for most managers, as the technical aspects may be too overwhelming and the basic concepts too daunting.

Problems With This Book

As good as it is, The Story About Ping is not without its faults. There is no index, and though the ping(8) man pages cover the command line options well enough, some review of them seems to be in order. Likewise, in a book solely about Ping, I would have expected a more detailed overview of the ICMP packet structure.

But even with these problems, The Story About Ping has earned a place on my bookshelf, right between Stevens' Advanced Programming in the Unix Environment, and my dog-eared copy of Dante's seminal work on MS Windows, Inferno. Who can read that passage on the Windows API ("Obscure, profound it was, and nebulous, So that by fixing on its depths my sight -- Nothing whatever I discerned therein."), without shaking their head with deep understanding. But I digress.

Man I love the internet!

Hope you enjoyed reading!

DYung

Relationship Mixer 4

Mind-Games :: Defined as :: psychological tricks (reverse psychology, etc..) used to gain an advantage on one's adversary.

At any point in a relationship there can be any sort of mind game going on. Granted i know a lot of people who hate such mind games as do i. In an engaged boyfriend/girlfriend relationship there are instances where each party tests the other on certain things. I would say that it goes for both sides of a relationship where the guy or girl will throw questions/tests at the significant other to see if they are "dedicated", "committed", or any of those major needs/wants in an ideal relationship. It usually sucks to be put in these kinds of situations, and you also can usually get that little clinch in your mind saying "Oh crap what's the right answer??". Obviously you will know the "right" answer, but your instinct answer may not be that "right" answer and you find yourself shunned for a bit. It sucks to put it plainly. And I don't know who gets the worse end of the spear, guys or girls, but as a guy who's experienced such "tests" it's never something to look forward to. So why do we do such things? As the definition of "mind-games" says :: "used to gain an advantage of one's "adversary"" Does putting a significant other into a situation where you want to hear a certain answer or they're being "insulting/mean/insensitive/etc" fair?? Since if they are wrong you then have an "advantage" over the situation and thus they are stuck in whatever direction you throw them in. Now you may say "that never happens to me!", but if you really think about it there is always a point where you are either the victim or the one playing the "mind-game" with the significant other. You may not realize right now since some people are really good with their words and can hide the intentions behind each question along with hiding their reaction to your answer. It can almost be like constant reverse psychology (in the extreme cases that is). Back to the question of whether it's fair or not, and obviously it isn't fair at all! Thankfully though not everyone does it to the extent of hindering a relationship, but there are those people who want to always have the upper hand in a relationship and will keep their significant other on a leash without them even realizing it! I've met people who LOVE mind-games and when 2 mind-game addicts come into play it's like a never ending cycle of messing with each other (i've witnessed this happen). On the other hand situations where there are constant mind-games usually never work out, it's all just fun and games until someone gets caught up in it too much and gets hurt. There are situations that call for mind-games, where a significant other needs to probe the other person's life to make sure things are alright, but these are sort of a normalized thing in relationships I'd say. The bad thing is when a small "test" is given and the tester over reacts to it, but that's going off-topic i think...

Mind-games aren't just in relationships. In the "dating" scene there's probably more and more of it. To take a template/example :: Guy and girl go out on a "date-ish", it's great and all, date ends and the "3 day rule" passes (for the guy to call or w/e). Girl over reacts and thinks the guy is a "jerk" for not calling her or talking to her after 3 days since clearly by tradition if the guy really likes her genuinely he would have. This is where mind-games are seen as the stupidest thing in the world. By the standards of the "3 day rule", which is a mind-game in itself for both guys and girls, the guy is labelled as a "jerk", that's unfair right? Then say 6 days pass and the guy wants to meet up again or "hang out". Here's where mind-games fail and ruin opportunities. For the guy he might be thinking, "I wanna take things slow and get to know her a little better before getting too involved..." Ok... and for the girl, "What the heck took him so long? He must not be interested..." and from there on in both the guy and the girl are completely confused to each other's intentions. Ok, i know that was a totally isolated example (since the roles could also be reversed and "thoughts" still applied to both sexes), but i hope you see what i'm getting to, which is that in this day and age we are almost "wired" to think there is a hidden intention behind certain actions done by the opposite sex. In a sense we think that any interaction between someone we "like" and us is some sort of mind-game where in reality it may not be at all! So now we're sorta stuck in the middle where we accept it as a mind-game and play along or just take things as they are and don't over think it. In my opinion :: I think it's always best not to complicate things and just go with whatever comes into our lives without over thinking things too much (keyword :: "too") Mind-games are easily avoided if you just go with what you want to do! So take for example, I like to get to know a potential significant other to a fair extent before i even consider take it to the next level per say. No mind-games on my end, but the problem with this is if the other person thinks there's a mind-game involved! Epic. Fail. So where does this leave us? With the fact that mind-games as inevitable as they are... just plain suck since everyone is different in their own "game" ( and i say this in the most relative definition being your ability to interact with the opposite sex ).

So i don't really know what a good conclusion statement would be. I guess I'd suggest to never assume things in your interactions with people especially with significant (or potential) others. Assuming is a big part of mind-games and is bad in general haha -enough said.

Life is life and we all live it.

Thanks for reading,

DYung

New post soon...

In the mean time...

http://ludomancy.com/games/today.html